[She's absolutely frozen in horror, watching as that ice spreads over his arm as if it means to encase him... like it had her that time...
And in spite of his warnings—]
No.
[—she moves back in, her arms wrapping around him stubbornly.
She shouldn't be so afraid. This is the second time that they have been through this, the first so much worse, but she is. She has been since he grabbed her hands in the dreamscape. But if she has to feel some of that same burn that he feels, then so be it. She will brave it if it means protecting him from it, or helping to fend it off, then she'll take all the ice that comes at her.]
Yell at me all you want. I'm not making that mistake ever again.
[The moment she touches him, inexplicable pain convulses through him, and he reels as he feels what feels like a scorching heat and burning chill at the same time.]
That snaps her back, her gasp audible, and the tears that had been burning the edges of her eyes now suddenly erupting and streaking down her cheeks as she stumbles back, forcing herself up and off the bed so quickly that she almost trips over Bri, who whines and falls back, all of their ears pinned down in fear at Eustace's voice.]
I...?
[She wraps her arms around herself, everything suddenly feeling cold. And not just the room. Her body feels like it's on fire on the inside, that wretched heat coming to a boil in her gut, but her skin prickles with the chill that continues to spread.]
... I didn't mean to. I'm...
[The words get all tangled on her tongue as they stumble out of her.]
[He gasps when she finally lets go, but knowing how hurt she must be from that pains him more than what he's physically experiencing.
Yet it's that physical pain that will overwhelm him for the moment as his hand grips the wall, dark frost climbing up the bark as everything continues to grow colder.
He has to stop this. And he has to do this on his own. At least... At least until he can have Tifa back with him. He never had a negative reaction to her before, so the only thing that changed was taking in that stupid Ice Queen's energy. That's as far as his thoughts can go before they're sent in disarray by that biting chill that threatens to overtake him.
But if the usual dreamotion can't help him, then he can only rely on his own nightmare energy to push it back. So once again he grits his teeth, and allow his left arm the arm that was so unaffected, suddenly crackle with black lightning as a sheet of dark blue frost engulfs it, almost like an armored glove. He would find it strange how it doesn't hurt like this were it not for the situation, but it is encouraging that it at least doesn't make it worse.
With his hand, now looking more like claws, digging into his blackened arm, he once again forces all of his own energy into it, the black lightning arcing over it as if trying to electrocute it out.]
[Her voice, already so small that she's not even sure she'd said his name at all, dies away the moment she sees the full extent of his arm with the ice and the lightning, the sound of it crackling startling her. Hearing the whining of the dogs, she gently shoos them all out and shuts the door behind them, their low growls and barks drowned out by the sound of Eustace's dreamotion in the otherwise silent, still room.
So still that Tifa is almost afraid that if she moves even the tiniest bit from where she is, takes even a step closer, she will hurt him. That if she so much as breathes again, she will break him.
All she can do is watch helplessly, her hands trembling as she holds them up in front of her. In surrender? An offer to help? She doesn't know anymore.
What she does know is that she can't hold him. Can't help him...
Can't do what she wants to do—needs to do because she promised him...
Besides the crackles of lightning and the looming feeling of the dramotion, the only sound that breaks this eerie silence are Tifa's quiet, stifled sobs.]
[Slowly, bit by bit, he's pushing back that invasive energy that tried to overwhelm him. Slowly, bit by bit, he can feel that darker side of him laughing and whispering how much he needs this dark part of him to be stronger. He ignores it, but he hates to admit that it's right, especially when it's clear it's working.
But he still refuses to completely succumb to it, either—that'll he'll remain in control.
...And he'll control whatever the fuck is inside him right now, too.
It'll be a stressful time for the both of them, but that strange chill will slowly recede, as if he's now drawing back into him, until at last he falls forward onto the bed, that black lightning crackling around him like static as he gasps for air before he looks over at Tifa, once again hating how he put her through this.]
Tifa... It's...
[He wants to tell her it's okay now. Wants to tell her that he wants her to come to him, hold him, warm him with her dreamotion and love that he desperately needs right now. But his strength fails him and he coughs as he completely collapses.]
[She stiffens when he looks at her, looking and feeling like she had done something wrong. Had she moved? Had she breathed? Those pangs of guilt when their eyes meet and she can see the pain within them are strong enough to send a sob tumbling out of her, but she can't bring her feet to carry her to him. No matter how badly she wants to hold him and promise him that she will keep him safe, she remains paralyzed.
...
That is, until he collapses, and all of that goes out the window for all of two seconds. She rushes forward, tripping over herself when she remembers his voice, his words...
"You're burning me—"
She hits the edge of the bed to stop herself, coughing when she loses some air in her lungs, and drops to her knees.]
[It takes him a bit to catch his breath and his senses, and he winces as he now feels the aftereffects of having to use so much untapped nightmare energy.]
It's...fine... It's different...
[He forces himself to look at her before holding out his hand to her.]
[A small shake of his head before he musters the strength to grab her hand and pull it to his face.]
Trust me.
[And instead of the blistering cold, she'll feel his warmth—even with his hand the way it is. There's still some of that chill, but it's a stark contrast to what it was before. A bit more him. And likewise, just her touch already gives him the warmth he so desperately seeks, eyes closing as he sighs.]
[He'll feel her tense the moment he reaches out to grab her hand, her fingers curling into a fist before he lifts it to his face. Only then will they unfurl, just enough, to touch him. Tifa still winces the moment her fingertips press to his skin, and she breaks with another sob, the fear clutching at her the same way that ice clutches to Eustace.
Her own personal nightmare, and it's lying on the bed right in front of her. A nightmare that she cannot wake up from.
The man that she loves—her husband—in so, so much pain and she has no idea what to do to to make it go away.]
Eustace, please tell me what's going on...
[She still can't quite bring herself to reach out to him on her own, but that hand that he holds stays where it is, even if every bone, every muscle in her is pulled as tight as a bowstring about to snap.]
[Not that he doesn't want to, he's just not in any condition to. Already he can feel his consciousness fading, grip weakening as he leans more heavily towards her as slowly the frost and lightning start to recede and dissipate.]
[She watches his face a moment longer, not daring to tear her eyes away lest she miss the first sign of pain, especially as she lets her hand relax against his cheek a little more, still pressed under his.
He says to trust him, and she does. Unconditionally. But she's stuck now between being too afraid to move any closer, and wanting to believe him when he says it's different, especially as she lets her gaze wander down to his shoulder and his arm, where that ice still lingers even after he's reached out to her.
As if all those nightmares she was afraid of have come back to taunt her.
Her other hand comes up, curling over the edge of the bed, and she lifts herself from her knees, a light sniffle leaving her. Slowly, she pushes herself up with a groan, and brings herself to sit at the edge of the bed where she watches him a little longer.
... Before she leans in and drapes her body over his, resting her weight on him as she brings her other arm to wrap around him, cautiously and hands still shaking, and closes her eyes...]
[Although now unconscious, his body will naturally lean into hers, and just her presence alone is helping to calm the stimulated energy, more and more of that frost and electricity disappearing. It'll be a slow process—he had used a lot after all—but at the very least his breathing will calm until it will seem as if he had just fallen back asleep.]
[She's never hurt him before, not with her dreamotion, and certainly not like that. It was always something that could heal him, heal them both, never harm. She thinks of their starflowers, even the ones that are withered along the headboard of their bed, and how bright their glow normally is. Of the little stars that always dance around them. Of the warm flames that kiss his cheek and his nose when he gets a little cold, or that blanket of warmth that comes over them when they're together.
How could it be used against him like this? What did she do wrong? Or rather, what is she not doing that could help make this go away? It's a hard question to ask when he doesn't answer... or when he might not even have the answers at all.
All she knows is that she's never been more scared of touching him, and of hurting him, than she is in this moment. He can beg her and plead with her to hold him until he can no longer speak, but she's not so sure that will change a thing.
Still. If it's what he wants... no, what he needs, then she is willing to push all of that aside. Stamp it out as she always does and be the pillar he needs to get through whatever this is.
So, when she feels him relaxing more and more, that darker, colder energy beginning to dull, she will finally loose that breath and carefully reach a hand out to brush it through his hair. Her eyes open so that she can watch over him as he sleeps, scanning his features for more signs of change, or of another nightmare coming for him. She had meant it when she said she would dive in to pull him out if she had to, and that hasn't changed.
Eventually, she moves, bringing herself up closer to him, shifting so that she's beside him rather than draped over him, so that she can more properly wrap her arms around him and pull him close, that hand on his cheek now cradling the back of his head and burying him into her neck.
Quietly, she whispers into his ear, wondering if he can still hear her voice.]
Just stay with me, okay? Don't go back to that place...
[That darker, scarier place where they had pulled themselves out of once before...]
[Deep in his subconscious in a place that's not quite dreaming but yet familiar, Eustace feels the different energies within him. Dreamotion, nightmare energy...and another. It's faint now, as if subdued, and he can sense his own growing as it continues to absorb it into its own. Had it been some kind of reaction? A last ditch effort to not be taken?
He doesn't know.
He's not sure if anyone would know, either, but...for now he allows himself to drift towards the flickering light that feels as if it could be snuffed out with just a breath. A little light that he can feel to be Tifa's hesitation and fears while trying to remain strong for him. Carefully he holds it close to his chest before he feels a presence and looks up to see himself—his "other" self—standing in front of him.
A self he still has yet to figure out if it's something else entirely or really is just a manifestation of his darker self. When it smiles with its red eyes gleaming, he can only hope it's something else, but—
Rejection is futile, you know?
That voice reminds him that it's not. That it really is just another form of himself that he while he's come to somewhat accept, he still loathes it all the same.
I kept warning you... Can't keep me buried forever. Should be thanking me or you would have been noctaere bait.
The smugness grates on his nerves, but Eustace just stares coldly at it. Because as much as he loathes it, he can't refute it. If he hadn't developed his skills as much as he had...
It's not so bad is it? This power? But...
His other self clicks its tongue as its gaze drifts off somewhere, and although Eustace looks over all he can see is darkness...and feel a cold wind.
You got something here. Better figure it out before it's too late.
With that his other self disappears into the darkness, and Eustace can only stare in confusion before he turns his gaze once more to where the other had been looking.
Something else? Did it mean from what he absorbed from the Ice Queen?
At that moment, there's a sharp prick of his neck, and its enough to rouse him, stirring in Tifa's arms with a grimace.]
[She's already awake when he stirs, or she's been awake this whole time, rather, watching him with her hand gently stroking through his hair in idle, sleepy motions. So when she feels him move even a little, there's that spike in panic in her chest that has her breath catching, and she holds him to her just a little more firmly.]
Eustace?
[Her voice is barely a whisper in his ear, tentative and testing to see if he can hear her, or if he's stuck again. There are no signs of more ice or electricity, so that's promising, but she isn't going to let out that sigh of relief just yet...]
[A rough murmur as he stirs more awake, wincing only from the lingering strain he just went through before he raises his arm to look and see it's more or less returned to normal with only faint traces still lingering.]
[She tries not to move too much when he says her name, only bringing herself back far enough that she can get a better, more proper look at him, her hands coming to hold both sides of his face. They are still a touch cold, but far better than what they had been just hours ago.]
[Didn't, is what she means to say, but they both know that is far from the truth. Heck, she's still scared now that she might hurt him if she even tries to warm her hands or his, or if those starflowers that surround them bloom any further than they have already tried.
So she takes a small breath and presses her forehead to his.]
You didn't mean to, it's okay. [He'll feel her clutch his face just a little tighter.] I'm sorry for hurting you...
[Something she'll probably never forgive herself for, even when they are long past this.]
Something shifts in Tifa's demeanour, her own eyes hardening, a shadow coming over them. Lips press firmly and her brows draw together in thought, and slowly, she pushes herself up to sit beside him, her hair falling away from her face. There's a new fear in her expression, or maybe it never left, she doesn't know, but it's there, clear as day, as she stares down at him in horrified disbelief.]
... What do you mean, against noctaere?
[The words come out strained against that horrible lump that's grown in her throat, and the dread that settles in the pit of her stomach.
She sounds almost angry that he could even be insinuating such a thing.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
flamekthunder) wrote2025-04-07 09:12 pm
no subject
And in spite of his warnings—]
No.
[—she moves back in, her arms wrapping around him stubbornly.
She shouldn't be so afraid. This is the second time that they have been through this, the first so much worse, but she is. She has been since he grabbed her hands in the dreamscape. But if she has to feel some of that same burn that he feels, then so be it. She will brave it if it means protecting him from it, or helping to fend it off, then she'll take all the ice that comes at her.]
Yell at me all you want. I'm not making that mistake ever again.
no subject
[The moment she touches him, inexplicable pain convulses through him, and he reels as he feels what feels like a scorching heat and burning chill at the same time.]
TIFA YOU'RE BURNING ME!
no subject
That snaps her back, her gasp audible, and the tears that had been burning the edges of her eyes now suddenly erupting and streaking down her cheeks as she stumbles back, forcing herself up and off the bed so quickly that she almost trips over Bri, who whines and falls back, all of their ears pinned down in fear at Eustace's voice.]
I...?
[She wraps her arms around herself, everything suddenly feeling cold. And not just the room. Her body feels like it's on fire on the inside, that wretched heat coming to a boil in her gut, but her skin prickles with the chill that continues to spread.]
... I didn't mean to. I'm...
[The words get all tangled on her tongue as they stumble out of her.]
I'm sorry.
no subject
Yet it's that physical pain that will overwhelm him for the moment as his hand grips the wall, dark frost climbing up the bark as everything continues to grow colder.
He has to stop this. And he has to do this on his own. At least... At least until he can have Tifa back with him. He never had a negative reaction to her before, so the only thing that changed was taking in that stupid Ice Queen's energy. That's as far as his thoughts can go before they're sent in disarray by that biting chill that threatens to overtake him.
But if the usual dreamotion can't help him, then he can only rely on his own nightmare energy to push it back. So once again he grits his teeth, and allow his left arm the arm that was so unaffected, suddenly crackle with black lightning as a sheet of dark blue frost engulfs it, almost like an armored glove. He would find it strange how it doesn't hurt like this were it not for the situation, but it is encouraging that it at least doesn't make it worse.
With his hand, now looking more like claws, digging into his blackened arm, he once again forces all of his own energy into it, the black lightning arcing over it as if trying to electrocute it out.]
no subject
[Her voice, already so small that she's not even sure she'd said his name at all, dies away the moment she sees the full extent of his arm with the ice and the lightning, the sound of it crackling startling her. Hearing the whining of the dogs, she gently shoos them all out and shuts the door behind them, their low growls and barks drowned out by the sound of Eustace's dreamotion in the otherwise silent, still room.
So still that Tifa is almost afraid that if she moves even the tiniest bit from where she is, takes even a step closer, she will hurt him. That if she so much as breathes again, she will break him.
All she can do is watch helplessly, her hands trembling as she holds them up in front of her. In surrender? An offer to help? She doesn't know anymore.
What she does know is that she can't hold him. Can't help him...
Can't do what she wants to do—needs to do because she promised him...
Besides the crackles of lightning and the looming feeling of the dramotion, the only sound that breaks this eerie silence are Tifa's quiet, stifled sobs.]
no subject
But he still refuses to completely succumb to it, either—that'll he'll remain in control.
...And he'll control whatever the fuck is inside him right now, too.
It'll be a stressful time for the both of them, but that strange chill will slowly recede, as if he's now drawing back into him, until at last he falls forward onto the bed, that black lightning crackling around him like static as he gasps for air before he looks over at Tifa, once again hating how he put her through this.]
Tifa... It's...
[He wants to tell her it's okay now. Wants to tell her that he wants her to come to him, hold him, warm him with her dreamotion and love that he desperately needs right now. But his strength fails him and he coughs as he completely collapses.]
no subject
...
That is, until he collapses, and all of that goes out the window for all of two seconds. She rushes forward, tripping over herself when she remembers his voice, his words...
"You're burning me—"
She hits the edge of the bed to stop herself, coughing when she loses some air in her lungs, and drops to her knees.]
Eustace, I can't... What am I supposed to do?
no subject
It's...fine... It's different...
[He forces himself to look at her before holding out his hand to her.]
Need... I need you... Now...
no subject
... No, what if I...?
[She shrinks back, less scared now of the nightmare energy and more terrified of what she might do to him if even just their fingers touch.]
I don't want to hurt you again.
no subject
Trust me.
[And instead of the blistering cold, she'll feel his warmth—even with his hand the way it is. There's still some of that chill, but it's a stark contrast to what it was before. A bit more him. And likewise, just her touch already gives him the warmth he so desperately seeks, eyes closing as he sighs.]
no subject
[He'll feel her tense the moment he reaches out to grab her hand, her fingers curling into a fist before he lifts it to his face. Only then will they unfurl, just enough, to touch him. Tifa still winces the moment her fingertips press to his skin, and she breaks with another sob, the fear clutching at her the same way that ice clutches to Eustace.
Her own personal nightmare, and it's lying on the bed right in front of her. A nightmare that she cannot wake up from.
The man that she loves—her husband—in so, so much pain and she has no idea what to do to to make it go away.]
Eustace, please tell me what's going on...
[She still can't quite bring herself to reach out to him on her own, but that hand that he holds stays where it is, even if every bone, every muscle in her is pulled as tight as a bowstring about to snap.]
no subject
[Not that he doesn't want to, he's just not in any condition to. Already he can feel his consciousness fading, grip weakening as he leans more heavily towards her as slowly the frost and lightning start to recede and dissipate.]
no subject
He says to trust him, and she does. Unconditionally. But she's stuck now between being too afraid to move any closer, and wanting to believe him when he says it's different, especially as she lets her gaze wander down to his shoulder and his arm, where that ice still lingers even after he's reached out to her.
As if all those nightmares she was afraid of have come back to taunt her.
Her other hand comes up, curling over the edge of the bed, and she lifts herself from her knees, a light sniffle leaving her. Slowly, she pushes herself up with a groan, and brings herself to sit at the edge of the bed where she watches him a little longer.
... Before she leans in and drapes her body over his, resting her weight on him as she brings her other arm to wrap around him, cautiously and hands still shaking, and closes her eyes...]
no subject
no subject
How could it be used against him like this? What did she do wrong? Or rather, what is she not doing that could help make this go away? It's a hard question to ask when he doesn't answer... or when he might not even have the answers at all.
All she knows is that she's never been more scared of touching him, and of hurting him, than she is in this moment. He can beg her and plead with her to hold him until he can no longer speak, but she's not so sure that will change a thing.
Still. If it's what he wants... no, what he needs, then she is willing to push all of that aside. Stamp it out as she always does and be the pillar he needs to get through whatever this is.
So, when she feels him relaxing more and more, that darker, colder energy beginning to dull, she will finally loose that breath and carefully reach a hand out to brush it through his hair. Her eyes open so that she can watch over him as he sleeps, scanning his features for more signs of change, or of another nightmare coming for him. She had meant it when she said she would dive in to pull him out if she had to, and that hasn't changed.
Eventually, she moves, bringing herself up closer to him, shifting so that she's beside him rather than draped over him, so that she can more properly wrap her arms around him and pull him close, that hand on his cheek now cradling the back of his head and burying him into her neck.
Quietly, she whispers into his ear, wondering if he can still hear her voice.]
Just stay with me, okay? Don't go back to that place...
[That darker, scarier place where they had pulled themselves out of once before...]
no subject
He doesn't know.
He's not sure if anyone would know, either, but...for now he allows himself to drift towards the flickering light that feels as if it could be snuffed out with just a breath. A little light that he can feel to be Tifa's hesitation and fears while trying to remain strong for him. Carefully he holds it close to his chest before he feels a presence and looks up to see himself—his "other" self—standing in front of him.
A self he still has yet to figure out if it's something else entirely or really is just a manifestation of his darker self. When it smiles with its red eyes gleaming, he can only hope it's something else, but—
Rejection is futile, you know?
That voice reminds him that it's not. That it really is just another form of himself that he while he's come to somewhat accept, he still loathes it all the same.
I kept warning you... Can't keep me buried forever. Should be thanking me or you would have been noctaere bait.
The smugness grates on his nerves, but Eustace just stares coldly at it. Because as much as he loathes it, he can't refute it. If he hadn't developed his skills as much as he had...
It's not so bad is it? This power? But...
His other self clicks its tongue as its gaze drifts off somewhere, and although Eustace looks over all he can see is darkness...and feel a cold wind.
You got something here. Better figure it out before it's too late.
With that his other self disappears into the darkness, and Eustace can only stare in confusion before he turns his gaze once more to where the other had been looking.
Something else? Did it mean from what he absorbed from the Ice Queen?
At that moment, there's a sharp prick of his neck, and its enough to rouse him, stirring in Tifa's arms with a grimace.]
no subject
Eustace?
[Her voice is barely a whisper in his ear, tentative and testing to see if he can hear her, or if he's stuck again. There are no signs of more ice or electricity, so that's promising, but she isn't going to let out that sigh of relief just yet...]
no subject
[A rough murmur as he stirs more awake, wincing only from the lingering strain he just went through before he raises his arm to look and see it's more or less returned to normal with only faint traces still lingering.]
no subject
I'm here. What is it?
no subject
[A small sigh as he leans into her hands.]
I'm sorry... For scaring you...
no subject
[Didn't, is what she means to say, but they both know that is far from the truth. Heck, she's still scared now that she might hurt him if she even tries to warm her hands or his, or if those starflowers that surround them bloom any further than they have already tried.
So she takes a small breath and presses her forehead to his.]
You didn't mean to, it's okay. [He'll feel her clutch his face just a little tighter.] I'm sorry for hurting you...
[Something she'll probably never forgive herself for, even when they are long past this.]
no subject
You couldn't have known... What happened was... Different.
no subject
[She leans in, looking like she is about to kiss him—and she is—but she hesitates, that longing and doubt both swirling in her sleepy eyes.]
no subject
[Well.
Yes he wants that kiss, but he feels he should say this before he forgets.
Or if it happens again.
So he places his hands on her shoulders to keep her back.]
What happened...
The reason why your dreamotion worked against me...is because of the nightmare energy I had absorbed from the Ice Queen, I think.
[Here he hesitates, since he's not completely certain, but it's the only thing that makes sense.]
Usually you help keep things balanced and it doesn't hurt... But this was as if I was experiencing a negative reaction...
[His eyes harden as he looks at her.]
Like how we use dreamotion to fight against noctaere.
no subject
Something shifts in Tifa's demeanour, her own eyes hardening, a shadow coming over them. Lips press firmly and her brows draw together in thought, and slowly, she pushes herself up to sit beside him, her hair falling away from her face. There's a new fear in her expression, or maybe it never left, she doesn't know, but it's there, clear as day, as she stares down at him in horrified disbelief.]
... What do you mean, against noctaere?
[The words come out strained against that horrible lump that's grown in her throat, and the dread that settles in the pit of her stomach.
She sounds almost angry that he could even be insinuating such a thing.]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
🎀